Bake something for someone.
Have you ever noticed how therapuetic baking can be? because I have. you follow directions. add things together. mix things. sometimes things that dont really seem like they should go together. and then next thing you know, something awesome comes out of it. sometimes its that way in life. when you least expect it things come together like that.
Doesn't happen overnight
but you turn around
And a month's gone by
and you realize you haven't criedI'm not giving you a hour or a second or another minute longerI'm busy getting stronger
Saturday, April 23, 2011
day 30 - further your career.
take a step to further your career.
this could be anything. go on an interview. ask for a raise. do something that gets you noticed. for me. it was interview. in 4 weeks i can start my career. so i'm realizing i need to start interviewing. start making connections. start my future now. I went on an interview. A place that i thought was just alright. but i went anyway. and guess what? it was awesome. interview went well. the place was amazing. and they offered me a job. with an amazing pay. and benefits. I couldnt even believe it. I was so caught up in missing him that i wasnt focusing on me. and the first time i do? this happens. life couldnt be better.
this could be anything. go on an interview. ask for a raise. do something that gets you noticed. for me. it was interview. in 4 weeks i can start my career. so i'm realizing i need to start interviewing. start making connections. start my future now. I went on an interview. A place that i thought was just alright. but i went anyway. and guess what? it was awesome. interview went well. the place was amazing. and they offered me a job. with an amazing pay. and benefits. I couldnt even believe it. I was so caught up in missing him that i wasnt focusing on me. and the first time i do? this happens. life couldnt be better.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
day 29- try something new
try a new place.
I found an article on OC register that had the top 10 best new bars in OC. There was this cool place called the "crosby". it described it as "hipster heaven". come on. what could be better? tattoo galore? i'm in. and it was all day happy hour monday. priceless. So my friend and i went to check it out. guess what they have?? pbr. for a DOLLAR. thats so cheap. you never find it like that. I mean, its pbr. its cheap anyway. but no bar has it for that. It was a small place, and not very crowded since we went at 5. but i could totally see it being slammin at night. definitely going to have to check back here. :)
The scars of your love remind me of us,
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all,
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless,
I can't help feeling,
We could have had it all,
I found an article on OC register that had the top 10 best new bars in OC. There was this cool place called the "crosby". it described it as "hipster heaven". come on. what could be better? tattoo galore? i'm in. and it was all day happy hour monday. priceless. So my friend and i went to check it out. guess what they have?? pbr. for a DOLLAR. thats so cheap. you never find it like that. I mean, its pbr. its cheap anyway. but no bar has it for that. It was a small place, and not very crowded since we went at 5. but i could totally see it being slammin at night. definitely going to have to check back here. :)
The scars of your love remind me of us,
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all,
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless,
I can't help feeling,
We could have had it all,
day 28 - watch a game
watch a game.
basketball. thats the only game i watch. and its playoffs. what better time of the year is there? play offs are amazing. today happened to be game one of the laker series. yesssss. went to yard house with a friend to watch the game. there suprisingly wasnt really a crowd. disappointed. AND the lakers lost. comeonnn.
posts are getting shorter and shorter. fewer and far between. suddenly its not about doing things to get my mind off him. its about doing things for me. my days fly by. my weeks fly by. my mind flies by.
basketball. thats the only game i watch. and its playoffs. what better time of the year is there? play offs are amazing. today happened to be game one of the laker series. yesssss. went to yard house with a friend to watch the game. there suprisingly wasnt really a crowd. disappointed. AND the lakers lost. comeonnn.
posts are getting shorter and shorter. fewer and far between. suddenly its not about doing things to get my mind off him. its about doing things for me. my days fly by. my weeks fly by. my mind flies by.
day 27 - help a friend.
Help out a friend.
So my friend bought a new house. and needed to paint the whole inside. so. I offered help. he offered beer. perfect mix right? right. spent my saturday painting the living room. and the bedroom. used the long paint rollers. arms were sore. blared girly music. laughed the whole day with my friends. drank beers. played j biebs. had a blast.
I'll get by, with a little help from my friends
So my friend bought a new house. and needed to paint the whole inside. so. I offered help. he offered beer. perfect mix right? right. spent my saturday painting the living room. and the bedroom. used the long paint rollers. arms were sore. blared girly music. laughed the whole day with my friends. drank beers. played j biebs. had a blast.
I'll get by, with a little help from my friends
Saturday, April 16, 2011
Day 26 - Go out with the girls
Go out with the girls tonight.
So the girls wanted to do girls night. Dinner and drinks. I dressed up. I did my hair. My make up. Put on my new necklace from shopping the other day. Put on heels. Felt good....for the first time in a while. Felt pretty. Went to dinner. Had a Spicy cucumber jalepeno margarita. So good. Ate shrimp...which i hate. and just talked. Not about him. We went to a new bar after. Something we'd never heard of...but decided to try. It was really cool. really different than anything I've ever been too. really loungey. had a beer. talked about life. they brought him up. its like i can never get away. i said my piece and changed the subject. Before I wanted to talk about him...all the time. because I couldnt get over it. now.. ill talk about anything but him. got looks from boys. had a boy buy me a drink. told you i looked good tonight. :) forgot about him. focused on me. and the boy that bought me a drink.
Everytime you get up
And get back in the race
One more small piece of you
Starts to fall into place
So the girls wanted to do girls night. Dinner and drinks. I dressed up. I did my hair. My make up. Put on my new necklace from shopping the other day. Put on heels. Felt good....for the first time in a while. Felt pretty. Went to dinner. Had a Spicy cucumber jalepeno margarita. So good. Ate shrimp...which i hate. and just talked. Not about him. We went to a new bar after. Something we'd never heard of...but decided to try. It was really cool. really different than anything I've ever been too. really loungey. had a beer. talked about life. they brought him up. its like i can never get away. i said my piece and changed the subject. Before I wanted to talk about him...all the time. because I couldnt get over it. now.. ill talk about anything but him. got looks from boys. had a boy buy me a drink. told you i looked good tonight. :) forgot about him. focused on me. and the boy that bought me a drink.
Everytime you get up
And get back in the race
One more small piece of you
Starts to fall into place
Day 25 - Take a new Class
Take a class.
Any kind of class. At the gym. At the community. At the school. Anything. I went to the gym and took a mat pilates class. SO FUN!. I hate yoga so I didnt know how it would be. but it was way more fun than i thought. Maybe it was because of the instructor. He was ridiculously gay. And i mean....flaming. He was too funny. He says "In and out" when youre breathing. then starts singing the in and out song. he says "rollie pollie'' when hes telling you to pull your tummy in. Or his other favorite is "squish your tummies". but he has an accent, and is very clearly gay. So its just really funny. He plays awesome music during the workout. Its not a slow class like yoga. Its almost more dancy. I really enjoyed it. And im already sore as heck. and i didnt think about him. I was so focused on myself and making myself better, that he was the last thing on my mind. I took it with a girlfriend so we giggled the whole way through it. I'm starting to be me again. I dont think of it all the time. I dont cry all the time. I dont miss him all the time.
Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand,
Any kind of class. At the gym. At the community. At the school. Anything. I went to the gym and took a mat pilates class. SO FUN!. I hate yoga so I didnt know how it would be. but it was way more fun than i thought. Maybe it was because of the instructor. He was ridiculously gay. And i mean....flaming. He was too funny. He says "In and out" when youre breathing. then starts singing the in and out song. he says "rollie pollie'' when hes telling you to pull your tummy in. Or his other favorite is "squish your tummies". but he has an accent, and is very clearly gay. So its just really funny. He plays awesome music during the workout. Its not a slow class like yoga. Its almost more dancy. I really enjoyed it. And im already sore as heck. and i didnt think about him. I was so focused on myself and making myself better, that he was the last thing on my mind. I took it with a girlfriend so we giggled the whole way through it. I'm starting to be me again. I dont think of it all the time. I dont cry all the time. I dont miss him all the time.
Cause when push comes to shove
You taste what you're made of
You might bend, till you break
Cause its all you can take
On your knees you look up
Decide you've had enough
You get mad you get strong
Wipe your hands shake it off
Then you Stand,
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Day 24 - Lifetime
Watch a lame lifetime movie.
I know you all have watched at least one before. I go through spurts. I'll record a whole bunch of them and watch them. Then I wont watch the channel for months. Today I was flipping through the channels and a movie was just starting. It was called double wedding. tia and tamera were in it. Remember them from sister sister? yeah. me too. So it was really lame. but also really awesome. It was about these twins, that were dating the same guy, but didnt know they were. Totally unrealistic right? I know. But it made me laugh. and shake my head. and at one point, i hate to admit it. but i cried. I dont know if it was because I missed that "love" feeling. Or what. but there were some tears.
for those of you girls that have never watched a lifetime movie. I highly suggest it. theyre so lame that theyre entertaining. the acting is so horrible it makes you laugh. and the plots are so unrealistic that you can predict every last detail. but still. watch it. I bet anything my sister has seen this one too. shes a lame lifetime junkie like myself. :)
I would've lied, could've cried
Should've tried harder
Done anything to make you stay
I wonder what you'd do if you looked out your window
And saw me runnin' down the runway just like I was crazy
But that fence is too high
So am I
So I'm just sittin' out here watchin' airplanes
Take off and fly
Tryin' to figure out which one you might be on
And why you don't love me anymore
I know you all have watched at least one before. I go through spurts. I'll record a whole bunch of them and watch them. Then I wont watch the channel for months. Today I was flipping through the channels and a movie was just starting. It was called double wedding. tia and tamera were in it. Remember them from sister sister? yeah. me too. So it was really lame. but also really awesome. It was about these twins, that were dating the same guy, but didnt know they were. Totally unrealistic right? I know. But it made me laugh. and shake my head. and at one point, i hate to admit it. but i cried. I dont know if it was because I missed that "love" feeling. Or what. but there were some tears.
for those of you girls that have never watched a lifetime movie. I highly suggest it. theyre so lame that theyre entertaining. the acting is so horrible it makes you laugh. and the plots are so unrealistic that you can predict every last detail. but still. watch it. I bet anything my sister has seen this one too. shes a lame lifetime junkie like myself. :)
I would've lied, could've cried
Should've tried harder
Done anything to make you stay
I wonder what you'd do if you looked out your window
And saw me runnin' down the runway just like I was crazy
But that fence is too high
So am I
So I'm just sittin' out here watchin' airplanes
Take off and fly
Tryin' to figure out which one you might be on
And why you don't love me anymore
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Day 23 - Taco Tuesday
Go have fun at Taco Tuesday.
Have a beer. Have a taco. Endulge and dont worry about anything. So one of my girlfriends called me. She's heartbroken. Her boyfriend dumped her. shes a mess. shes like me. So naturally. i got the girls together. and we went to taco tuesday. it was crowded. and fun. and all you can eat. we each at SIX tacos. granted they're like baby tacos. but still. six. im still full and i've been home for 2 hours. I dont know what I was thinking. but sometimes. you just have to not think. have fun with the girls. forget about everything else. forget about him.
A patient told me today that i was a good woman. that i'd make a great wife one day. but he hoped it wasnt to some scoundrel. I told him i usually find myself with jerky guys. and his response. "were all jerks. but you'll find one someday that will want to change for you. and wont be a jerk anymore"
well then. i leave you with this.
"I might have to wait, I'll never give upI
guess it's half timing, and the other half's luck
Wherever you are, whenever it's right
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life
And I know that we can be so amazing
And, baby, your love is gonna change me
And now I can see every possibility
And somehow I know that it'll all turn out
You'll make me work, so we can work to work it out
And I promise you, kid, I give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet"
Have a beer. Have a taco. Endulge and dont worry about anything. So one of my girlfriends called me. She's heartbroken. Her boyfriend dumped her. shes a mess. shes like me. So naturally. i got the girls together. and we went to taco tuesday. it was crowded. and fun. and all you can eat. we each at SIX tacos. granted they're like baby tacos. but still. six. im still full and i've been home for 2 hours. I dont know what I was thinking. but sometimes. you just have to not think. have fun with the girls. forget about everything else. forget about him.
A patient told me today that i was a good woman. that i'd make a great wife one day. but he hoped it wasnt to some scoundrel. I told him i usually find myself with jerky guys. and his response. "were all jerks. but you'll find one someday that will want to change for you. and wont be a jerk anymore"
well then. i leave you with this.
"I might have to wait, I'll never give upI
guess it's half timing, and the other half's luck
Wherever you are, whenever it's right
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life
And I know that we can be so amazing
And, baby, your love is gonna change me
And now I can see every possibility
And somehow I know that it'll all turn out
You'll make me work, so we can work to work it out
And I promise you, kid, I give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet"
Monday, April 11, 2011
Day 22 - join a dating site.
Join a dating website.
Yeah. You heard me. Join one. I'm already part of one. My friend made me sign up for one last year, and I never really used it. So i activated it. and suprisingly, its kinda awesome. Even though I dont really message people back that often, its a total self esteem booster. guys are constantly messaging you telling you how awesome you are. I'm not sure who i'll actually end up going out with. Or if i even will. But its definitely a good distraction. As lame as it sounds, it totally fills the "texting" void i've had. I used to text him all day. everyday. and now...thats gone. but whenever i feel the need to text him, i'll log onto the dating website app, and have like 10 messages. Its kinda fun.
who knows. Maybe ill go on a date as my activity one of these days. Ive never really been on dates. I usually know the guy before I get in a relationship with them and somehow just am in a relationship without dating. I need to date around. test the waters before I get in a relationship. And who knows, maybe the dating site will help me with that.
"now you'll never see. what youve done to me. you can take back your memories. they're no good to me. and heres all your lies. you can look me in the eye. with that sad sad look that you wear so well."
Yeah. You heard me. Join one. I'm already part of one. My friend made me sign up for one last year, and I never really used it. So i activated it. and suprisingly, its kinda awesome. Even though I dont really message people back that often, its a total self esteem booster. guys are constantly messaging you telling you how awesome you are. I'm not sure who i'll actually end up going out with. Or if i even will. But its definitely a good distraction. As lame as it sounds, it totally fills the "texting" void i've had. I used to text him all day. everyday. and now...thats gone. but whenever i feel the need to text him, i'll log onto the dating website app, and have like 10 messages. Its kinda fun.
who knows. Maybe ill go on a date as my activity one of these days. Ive never really been on dates. I usually know the guy before I get in a relationship with them and somehow just am in a relationship without dating. I need to date around. test the waters before I get in a relationship. And who knows, maybe the dating site will help me with that.
"now you'll never see. what youve done to me. you can take back your memories. they're no good to me. and heres all your lies. you can look me in the eye. with that sad sad look that you wear so well."
Day 21 - Shop.
Go shopping for whatever you love.
Go shopping. Even if you don't have a lot of extra money. go somewhere cheap. I love big rings. and big necklaces. I wear them every day. i love them. people know me for the big rings i wear. Wanna know where i buy them? down town LA. for a dollar. Yup. dollar. one of my friends asked me to take her down there and show her the ropes. get her the deals. So why not? I love a little shopping spree.
spent about 2 hours in the garment district. bought 3 rings. 4 necklaces. 2 pairs of earrings. 1 hair flower. parking. some excellent chile powder, lemon juice covered pinapple. guess how much I spent? $16.
She asked me about him. Last time I saw her, I was going up to visit him. The weekend that ruined things. I answered her questions. She couldnt believe it. She thought he was so great. She thought wrong. I thought wrong. I didn't cry. I wasnt sad. Im moving on.
"truth be told i miss you. truth be told im lying. when you see my face hope it gives you hell. when you walk my way hope it gives you hell. hope it gives you hell."
Go shopping. Even if you don't have a lot of extra money. go somewhere cheap. I love big rings. and big necklaces. I wear them every day. i love them. people know me for the big rings i wear. Wanna know where i buy them? down town LA. for a dollar. Yup. dollar. one of my friends asked me to take her down there and show her the ropes. get her the deals. So why not? I love a little shopping spree.
spent about 2 hours in the garment district. bought 3 rings. 4 necklaces. 2 pairs of earrings. 1 hair flower. parking. some excellent chile powder, lemon juice covered pinapple. guess how much I spent? $16.
She asked me about him. Last time I saw her, I was going up to visit him. The weekend that ruined things. I answered her questions. She couldnt believe it. She thought he was so great. She thought wrong. I thought wrong. I didn't cry. I wasnt sad. Im moving on.
"truth be told i miss you. truth be told im lying. when you see my face hope it gives you hell. when you walk my way hope it gives you hell. hope it gives you hell."
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Day 20- Go on a boat!
Go on a boat. On a tour. On the ocean.
Whale watching. Thats what we did. SO FUN. Ok so the whale was kind of boring. but at least we saw one! They told us they were 0/19 on whale sightings. We got on the boat and headed out to the water and within about 5 minutes saw a grey whale. You could see his blow hole (i feel like theres a thats what she said comment somewhere in here). And the water shooting up. He did a few breaches so we could see his back, but he never flipped his tail up. which was slightly disappointing. We did however see a pod of dolphins before. Ive seen dolphins before, maybe like 20 in a group or something. But man, there had to be upwards of 200 here. There were so many. they surrounded the boat. they jumped up. out of the water. they had the baby dolphins right by them. they were SO cute. I LOVE dolphins. they're my 2nd favorite water animal. first? beluga whale. haha. Theyre so ugly that they're cute. :) We bought our tickets off Groupon so it was only 15 dollars to go for 2 hours. It was quite fun, and i'd definitely suggest it.
"im surrounded by, a million people and i, still feel all alone. i wanna go home. "
Whale watching. Thats what we did. SO FUN. Ok so the whale was kind of boring. but at least we saw one! They told us they were 0/19 on whale sightings. We got on the boat and headed out to the water and within about 5 minutes saw a grey whale. You could see his blow hole (i feel like theres a thats what she said comment somewhere in here). And the water shooting up. He did a few breaches so we could see his back, but he never flipped his tail up. which was slightly disappointing. We did however see a pod of dolphins before. Ive seen dolphins before, maybe like 20 in a group or something. But man, there had to be upwards of 200 here. There were so many. they surrounded the boat. they jumped up. out of the water. they had the baby dolphins right by them. they were SO cute. I LOVE dolphins. they're my 2nd favorite water animal. first? beluga whale. haha. Theyre so ugly that they're cute. :) We bought our tickets off Groupon so it was only 15 dollars to go for 2 hours. It was quite fun, and i'd definitely suggest it.
"im surrounded by, a million people and i, still feel all alone. i wanna go home. "
Day 19 - Happy Hour
Go to happy hour.
So i'm not the type of person that calls up someone to make plans....yet i'm always busy. I dunno, maybe i'll send a text sometimes asking what someone is doing. But i rarely am the first to try and make plans. I have this weird phobia of asking questions. I know that sounds silly, but its true. My family makes fun of me for it. I wont even ask for something at a restaurant. But thats just me.
I got home from work on friday (have I mentioned Im home by 4 these days? amazing) and I thought i was going to take a nap. I was about to get in bed, and i thought. why not see what my friend was doing? She works far from where she lives and my house seems to be right in the middle. She always tries to go to happy hour with me so she doesnt have to sit in traffic, but i'm usually busy. But today, without thought, I called her up and asked her to meet me at happy hour. She was about to pass my house, so it was perfect timing. We met up at Fridays and had such a good time. We drank, we ate, we laughed, we talked, and we played trivia. Her fiance came, who is also one of my good friends. It was such a fun time! I dont know if you ever have played trivia at a bar, but its super fun. Because you spend half the time looking around the bar to see who else is playing and who all the code names were.
best news of all? I didnt think of him. I didnt talk about him. I didnt want him. I was happy right where I was.
"so watch me strike a match on all my wasted time. As far as I'm concerned youre just another picture to burn."
So i'm not the type of person that calls up someone to make plans....yet i'm always busy. I dunno, maybe i'll send a text sometimes asking what someone is doing. But i rarely am the first to try and make plans. I have this weird phobia of asking questions. I know that sounds silly, but its true. My family makes fun of me for it. I wont even ask for something at a restaurant. But thats just me.
I got home from work on friday (have I mentioned Im home by 4 these days? amazing) and I thought i was going to take a nap. I was about to get in bed, and i thought. why not see what my friend was doing? She works far from where she lives and my house seems to be right in the middle. She always tries to go to happy hour with me so she doesnt have to sit in traffic, but i'm usually busy. But today, without thought, I called her up and asked her to meet me at happy hour. She was about to pass my house, so it was perfect timing. We met up at Fridays and had such a good time. We drank, we ate, we laughed, we talked, and we played trivia. Her fiance came, who is also one of my good friends. It was such a fun time! I dont know if you ever have played trivia at a bar, but its super fun. Because you spend half the time looking around the bar to see who else is playing and who all the code names were.
best news of all? I didnt think of him. I didnt talk about him. I didnt want him. I was happy right where I was.
"so watch me strike a match on all my wasted time. As far as I'm concerned youre just another picture to burn."
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Day 18 - Plan a trip
Plan a trip somewhere. anywhere.
Vegas. Thats what I'm planning. I'm getting out of here. partying. celebrating. having my time. my friends time. vegas time. I'm going memorial weekend with friends from school to celebrate graduation and done with clinicals. and it happens to be my bday time. so thats good! Today we did the preliminary business. Looked up hotels and prices. Not too bad. were getting a suite. celebrating in style. You ever have one of those vegas trips where you stay up till 6 am? stumble back to your room, sleeep a few hours then go start drinking again at the pool? take a nap then get ready to go out at like 10pm? yeah. thats what i'm thinking. sounds about right. havent had one of those in a while. :-)
"Thats what you get for waking up in vegas"
Vegas. Thats what I'm planning. I'm getting out of here. partying. celebrating. having my time. my friends time. vegas time. I'm going memorial weekend with friends from school to celebrate graduation and done with clinicals. and it happens to be my bday time. so thats good! Today we did the preliminary business. Looked up hotels and prices. Not too bad. were getting a suite. celebrating in style. You ever have one of those vegas trips where you stay up till 6 am? stumble back to your room, sleeep a few hours then go start drinking again at the pool? take a nap then get ready to go out at like 10pm? yeah. thats what i'm thinking. sounds about right. havent had one of those in a while. :-)
"Thats what you get for waking up in vegas"
Day 17 - catch up with a friend
catch up with a friend.
Hang out with someone you havent seen in a while. For me, it was a girl i've known since kindergarden. We go months without talking, but then when we see eachother, its like no times gone by. She wanted to go into the spa and have wine. again. we talked about him. but you know what? she had some good advice. i've been trying to figure out why its SO hard to get over him. what is holding me back? we talked about it, and it makes sense. for the first time i actually had plans for my future. for my life. I had a date I was moving. a place i was going to live. a boy i was going to spend my life with. but hes just that... a boy. and he got scared. and for that. MY LIFE changed. I feel like i'm starting over. from scratch. and thats hard.
But even though we talked about him, it was so nice to connect with a friend i havent in a while. It sucks that it takes breaking up with a boyfriend to reconnect with a friend. but maybe its a good thing. It never hurts to have friends around.
"I'm over my head, and I know it
I'm doing my best not to show it
Whatever it takes to be what I was meant to be, I'm going to try
Cause I'm living the dream and I know it,
I'm trying my best not to blow it,
And I know everything will be fine
With me, myself and time.
I'll find myself in time,
I know I'll find myself in time"
Hang out with someone you havent seen in a while. For me, it was a girl i've known since kindergarden. We go months without talking, but then when we see eachother, its like no times gone by. She wanted to go into the spa and have wine. again. we talked about him. but you know what? she had some good advice. i've been trying to figure out why its SO hard to get over him. what is holding me back? we talked about it, and it makes sense. for the first time i actually had plans for my future. for my life. I had a date I was moving. a place i was going to live. a boy i was going to spend my life with. but hes just that... a boy. and he got scared. and for that. MY LIFE changed. I feel like i'm starting over. from scratch. and thats hard.
But even though we talked about him, it was so nice to connect with a friend i havent in a while. It sucks that it takes breaking up with a boyfriend to reconnect with a friend. but maybe its a good thing. It never hurts to have friends around.
"I'm over my head, and I know it
I'm doing my best not to show it
Whatever it takes to be what I was meant to be, I'm going to try
Cause I'm living the dream and I know it,
I'm trying my best not to blow it,
And I know everything will be fine
With me, myself and time.
I'll find myself in time,
I know I'll find myself in time"
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Day 16 - Spa sesh!
Relax in the spa.
It's been a long week already and its only tuesday. I'm exhausted. I'm drained. I'm numb. but I ache. And I dont just mean my heart. I physically ache. I don't know if its my physically demanding job. Or all the emotions catching up. Or if I'm getting sick. all i know, is my entire body aches. So when my friend suggested a spa sesh, I was down.
There were just three of us that went to the spa at my friends apartment complex. No wine. no music. just us. and we talked. the girls honestly didn't know I had even broken up with him. I've kept it to myself alot. kept it quiet. havent talked about it. but tonight, when they asked. it was the first time i talked. i didn't cry. i didnt get mad. i talked about it. it happened, i acknowledged it. and im slowly moving on. One of my friends was talking about her boy problems too. and how she has a friend in egypt that is going through the same thing with a boy. EGYPT! It kind of dawned on me tonight, that i'm not the only person feeling like this in the world. (duh right?) I mean, i've been so miserable and caught up in myself, but if you think about it, how many people do you know going through a break up right now? ALOT? yeah.
I drove home with that on my mind. Its such a clear night tonight that you can see so many stars out. I looked up at the stars and wondered how many people in the world are doing the same thing right now? staring up at the sky. getting over him. moving onto themselves. I bet you theres more than you think. were not alone.
"I get by with a little help from my friends"
It's been a long week already and its only tuesday. I'm exhausted. I'm drained. I'm numb. but I ache. And I dont just mean my heart. I physically ache. I don't know if its my physically demanding job. Or all the emotions catching up. Or if I'm getting sick. all i know, is my entire body aches. So when my friend suggested a spa sesh, I was down.
There were just three of us that went to the spa at my friends apartment complex. No wine. no music. just us. and we talked. the girls honestly didn't know I had even broken up with him. I've kept it to myself alot. kept it quiet. havent talked about it. but tonight, when they asked. it was the first time i talked. i didn't cry. i didnt get mad. i talked about it. it happened, i acknowledged it. and im slowly moving on. One of my friends was talking about her boy problems too. and how she has a friend in egypt that is going through the same thing with a boy. EGYPT! It kind of dawned on me tonight, that i'm not the only person feeling like this in the world. (duh right?) I mean, i've been so miserable and caught up in myself, but if you think about it, how many people do you know going through a break up right now? ALOT? yeah.
I drove home with that on my mind. Its such a clear night tonight that you can see so many stars out. I looked up at the stars and wondered how many people in the world are doing the same thing right now? staring up at the sky. getting over him. moving onto themselves. I bet you theres more than you think. were not alone.
"I get by with a little help from my friends"
Monday, April 4, 2011
Day 15 - Do you.
Do you. the right way. the cheap way.
I've been neglecting myself so much. I know its true. Between getting over him and doing my clinicals. I dont have time for me. at all. I work. I sleep. I cry. i'm in a daze. I feel numb. except I still cry.
But today was about me.
I painted my nails.
I painted my toes
I whitened my teeth
I used one of those nose strips.
I french braided my hair after the shower so itll be all wavey tomorrow.
I took a nap.
I washed clothes.
I didn't miss him.
well maybe only a little. but thats better right?
"the hardest part of ending is starting again." true story.
I've been neglecting myself so much. I know its true. Between getting over him and doing my clinicals. I dont have time for me. at all. I work. I sleep. I cry. i'm in a daze. I feel numb. except I still cry.
But today was about me.
I painted my nails.
I painted my toes
I whitened my teeth
I used one of those nose strips.
I french braided my hair after the shower so itll be all wavey tomorrow.
I took a nap.
I washed clothes.
I didn't miss him.
well maybe only a little. but thats better right?
"the hardest part of ending is starting again." true story.
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Day 14 - watch TV.
Catch up on all your favorite shows.
So we all record things. Things that look interesting. shows you love. shows you want to love. but do we really have time to watch them all? If youre anything like me...you sure don't. I have like weeks worth of shows recorded, but havnet watched them. So today, while i was recovering from my crazy san diego night i watched them all. I watched greys, private practice, american idol, house, rules of engagement, big bang theory, csi. everything. I didn't realize I record so many shows I dont get a chance to watch. it was a lazy. awesome. wonderful day.
time for bed to prepare for the crazy week starting tomorrow!
So we all record things. Things that look interesting. shows you love. shows you want to love. but do we really have time to watch them all? If youre anything like me...you sure don't. I have like weeks worth of shows recorded, but havnet watched them. So today, while i was recovering from my crazy san diego night i watched them all. I watched greys, private practice, american idol, house, rules of engagement, big bang theory, csi. everything. I didn't realize I record so many shows I dont get a chance to watch. it was a lazy. awesome. wonderful day.
time for bed to prepare for the crazy week starting tomorrow!
Day 13 - get out of town
Get out of town.
Even if its just for the day. just for the night. an hour away. anything. Theres too many things here that remind you of him. too many places you went. too many people. sometimes its nice to get away. forget everything around you. forget everyone. just take off and disapear. And thats exactly what I did.
I took off to san diego with my best friend to stay with her brother. We went to downtown and had quite the day of Day Drinking. try it. SO fun. you don't worry about anything. you watch the sports games on. you talk to people. you get drinks bought for you. you make friends. and best of all? you dont think of him. I spent a total of $11 the whole day. That is after drinking, taking shots, and eating. twice. Guess it pays off to be a girl huh?
almost two weeks down. the rest of my life to go....
Even if its just for the day. just for the night. an hour away. anything. Theres too many things here that remind you of him. too many places you went. too many people. sometimes its nice to get away. forget everything around you. forget everyone. just take off and disapear. And thats exactly what I did.
I took off to san diego with my best friend to stay with her brother. We went to downtown and had quite the day of Day Drinking. try it. SO fun. you don't worry about anything. you watch the sports games on. you talk to people. you get drinks bought for you. you make friends. and best of all? you dont think of him. I spent a total of $11 the whole day. That is after drinking, taking shots, and eating. twice. Guess it pays off to be a girl huh?
almost two weeks down. the rest of my life to go....
Saturday, April 2, 2011
Day 12 - See a Movie with a friend
Go see a movie!
Total spur of the moment idea. I was with a friend from school and we were having a few drinks watching this really lame performer. He loves movies (yes I said he. but totally platonic!). So we were talking about whats out right now, and we looked up Incedious (think thats how you spell it...too lazy to look it up!) The reviews said things like "scariest movie i've seen in a long time" but it was only rated PG13. how scary could it be? My friend doesnt LOVE scary movies....but agreed to see it because I really wanted to.
We walk into the theater and its packed. we squeeze into the middle of a close row that had two open seats. Sit down. Lights go out. movie starts. It was kind of filmed like paranormal activity. But I wasnt really scared by paranormal...it was just alright. But this? Man. My friend made fun of me because on multiple times I jumped, gasped, or screamed. and it wasnt just me! The whole audience did. everyone laughed at themselves, but at the same time, were super scared. I watched the movie hidden behind my jacket the whole time. Definitely thought i'd have nightmares when I got home. Overall. Good movie. Too bad my friend kept falling asleep. I kept poking him to make sure he saw the scary parts. I guess thats what happens when you drink before watching a movie. haha.
Off topic...but for some reason I keep singing these lines over and over in my head. maybe its a good thing?
"hate is a strong word, but i really really really dont like you. now that its over, i dont even know what i liked about you. brought you around. and you just brought me down. Hate is a strong word, but i really really really dont like you".
hmmm.
Total spur of the moment idea. I was with a friend from school and we were having a few drinks watching this really lame performer. He loves movies (yes I said he. but totally platonic!). So we were talking about whats out right now, and we looked up Incedious (think thats how you spell it...too lazy to look it up!) The reviews said things like "scariest movie i've seen in a long time" but it was only rated PG13. how scary could it be? My friend doesnt LOVE scary movies....but agreed to see it because I really wanted to.
We walk into the theater and its packed. we squeeze into the middle of a close row that had two open seats. Sit down. Lights go out. movie starts. It was kind of filmed like paranormal activity. But I wasnt really scared by paranormal...it was just alright. But this? Man. My friend made fun of me because on multiple times I jumped, gasped, or screamed. and it wasnt just me! The whole audience did. everyone laughed at themselves, but at the same time, were super scared. I watched the movie hidden behind my jacket the whole time. Definitely thought i'd have nightmares when I got home. Overall. Good movie. Too bad my friend kept falling asleep. I kept poking him to make sure he saw the scary parts. I guess thats what happens when you drink before watching a movie. haha.
Off topic...but for some reason I keep singing these lines over and over in my head. maybe its a good thing?
"hate is a strong word, but i really really really dont like you. now that its over, i dont even know what i liked about you. brought you around. and you just brought me down. Hate is a strong word, but i really really really dont like you".
hmmm.
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